Years ago, I heard a man named Douglas Callister say something that has stuck with me ever since.
"If we know the books located at the bedside, we know much about the man."
To me, the idea is that the media we consume doesn't only refine
(influence) us, but it defines (explains) us, too.
It's an interesting claim which I believe is true. It's actually related to a question I like to ask in my life story interviews:
What are some books that have been meaningful to you?
As you may imagine, the answers are telling.
The same question can be asked about music, art, or any other consumable media. From a personal history-perspective,
the neat thing about naming some of these things that bring you joy is the opportunity it provides for your audience to find deeper connection with you through their own relationship with that thing.
Have you ever experienced that? For me, it happened just the other day.
My girls and I were visiting their nana (my husband's mom) when I thought to ask her about the music she listened to when she was younger. She said that she couldn't remember much music growing up but that as a young adult, she enjoyed listening to Lionel Richie. I immediately smiled when she said that, and instantly felt a new connection to her.
Although Lionel's heyday came before my time, I discovered his album
Tuskegee a few years ago and several of the songs on it have become fast favorites. Although I'm not exactly sure what my mother-in-law's consumption of his music looked like, hearing that she enjoyed listening to him helped me to imagine and see her as myself: a young mom, turning on music at the end of a long day to cook dinner and help everyone get through till bedtime. Whether that's how it happened for her or not, since that time, each time I have heard a Lionel Richie song, it's made me think of her.
Funnily enough, it can be just as small of a thing that can help you build connection and inspire legacy with your family too. Try this: make a list of the 'books at your bedside,' or the songs, musicians, authors, speakers, and artists you resonate with. Put it in your personal history. Chances are,
even if you don't share a common love for that thing, you will at the very least have created an association to evoke memory, and connection, forevermore.
I'd love to hear your experience if you try it.
Happy connection-finding,
Kasia
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